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Showing posts from April, 2022

Another Peanut Butter...

Yes, we kids grew up on Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches. It's was mostly a 1960s thing. Especially, if you were a blue collar, lower income to middle class kid. Lucky enough to live on a land with grass and trees. Your parents may have even had a 'Victory Garden' as my parents did.   As our childhood years passed, my mother was seeing her motherhood wither away. She wanted more children. Like it was her job. Her purpose. However, she truly enjoyed working too. It was and wasn't always about the money. Although, we sorely needed any extra we could get. Preteen I was barely bothered by that truth. The lack of funds that is. Even so, my Mom truly wanted at least another child. She spoke about it often privately with me.  Then suddenly, after we had just moved into my parent's first owned home before my eleventh birthday, Mom was pregnant. She told me privately first. I was curious. But said nothing, hoping for a younger brother to share my love of football

Its About Suffering

I remember when over fifty years ago, before I was age of ten. My Mom would lament, "Do not ask why you are here..." Then she would give me three reasons to live. Yes, that's what she did. She started saying this to me by age seven.  Funny enough, it was not in response to anything about me, personally. It was as if the thought just crossed her mind. Although as a child back then, I had no clue.  I had no clue that it was what was inside of her. She was asking herself, 'what was her purpose.?'   The purpose of Her existence she queried. I can say fully well, she had every reason for that query. I'll explain. There are a multitude of reasons why she wondered about her purpose. Four years ago, my husband realizing some unrelenting horrors of my mother's life from the word go. He commented, "Your mother had a horrible life." He wagged his head and continued, "She couldn't get a break between her childhood, and her adult life." I

One Cell

Are we aware that we are aware? Laying in bed on a weekend morning, knowing you have one big chore to get done right now. Well, time-wise a small every day chore of necessity, obligation, respect... Thoughts of small enormity, embrace my mind. Do I have to get up? Do I have to do? Of course I did my morning exercises in bed so I could arrive upright and not appear with a crippled wobble or drag into the bathroom.  My thought is... if I'm standing I can run. As I lay there for a few moments more, I query my life. Aside from thinking of an astronomical goal, because I almost always have them. Don't worry the world is involved. They don't know it yet. I don't say anything till I need to get them involved. I lasso what I can.  Somewhere around late 2007 my husband exclaimed, "You're out of my universe." He wagged his head and continued, "You have your own Solar System." That was in response to what I'd said after, "What if...? Imagine

Hello...Mr. Potato Head...

Presenting Mr. Potato-Head... in July... in Death Valley So Jim, Steve and hubby Norm Reicher are crewing me in 2005 across Death Valley.  It's about 125 to 128 degrees.  A man from France is racing just ahead, He's got like aluminum foil on his head.  I cannot laugh and run, I'll fall over.  Meanwhile his crew is ehhh hmmm, putting on a eh cough....show.  He has two rather good looking female crew members and a guy who looks like a brunette Fabio.  You know the guy who did the ad for " I can't believe it's not butter".   Oh and Fabio has no shirt on and a one girl ...eek...barely dressed.  Like bathing suit top on  ( no pool in sight); the other short shorts on.  But the one thing I'm fixated on is passing this French  guy who reminds me of  'Jiffy Pop Popcorn'.  It's stuck in my head.  I eventually pass him.  135 miles later, I finish.  Dr. Jim Manning Norm(Hubby) and Steve Papp are wiped.  Forty hours of crewing for me in the heat of the

Confidence

Confidence, has many meanings. Could be defined as truth, faith, belief, or some kind of assurance. One day in 1994 as I sat in the back room of Tom Fleming's Running Room store. (Note: Tom Fleming won NY City Marathon 2x, as well placed in top ten at Boston at least six times.) He and I were having this discussion. He realized or supposed I lacked confidence. He said, "You know who's supposed to give you confidence. Don't you?" I replied, "Uh. Who?" He responded, "Your parents are where you get your confidence from." I was void of such a thought. I had no clue and he knew it. I replied, "I thought it was up to me." He wagged his head 'No'. Over the years after that conversation, I did know I was on my own. That confidence was temporary. I'd witnessed enough, experienced enough... Secretly understanding that the rest of the world I lived in had a disadvantage... They had confidence in confidence. Meaning, they did

Stay the Course

  Stay the Course Today as I nearly acquiesced my fatigue. Which was from gradually increasing my running miles again in the same week as cleaning up our yard from the winter storms and the Ides of March. That along with my writing, studies, and research. The more now volatile New Jersey Springter, which has most of our immune systems not knowing whether their coming or going. Oh Springter? As I’ve dubbed New Jersey’s weather in mid-April, a cross between Spring and Winter. This morning, I got our youngest ready for another quarter back to school. It was after her nine day vacation from nearly all of it. I myself am not ever on vacation. It’s a rare moment that I am on vacation. No, it’s not about motherhood or anything of that sort. It’s about who I am. My intensity. Just when I want to rest, there is something that I see needs doing. Over the years, I’ve sat back and wondered, ‘How do these people just vacate and do practically nothing?’ Outside of my world, other people go to

Part of Life...

So, I saw this post on social media this past week on two occasions...The person shows a set of photos showing her daughter not making a volleyball team in junior high.  My thoughts go like so... There should be NO 6th place trophies. Ever! How's that kid going to know the how or the why to get a job or go for a career she wants? When do we stop hovering as parents?  Children need to understand a few things. One, is that very few if any humans are Great or even Good at everything. Secondly, to attain most things in life such as a basic living, perhaps wealth, or a skill set takes work. Consistent, hard work, lots of it. And once in a while depending on the situation, some luck. Yet, I believe it also takes Faith as well. And at times perhaps, the relentlessness of a pit bull-like attitude.  What I've witnessed in helping corner men as fighters here and there. As well as coaching adults and children for their competitive running and the like. And as well in my therapy business

The Old Strange

 As I attend track meets. The ones at home are where you see quite a few more parents than the 'away' track meets.  Someone I knew and hadn't seen in months, leaned up against the fence said, 'Hi'. Then asked, "How are you?" . I replied in kind. "I'm great. And you?" She said, "What a time period, huh? Actually, for you it's been... rough." She sighed. I hearing her gasp and head rattle a tad. I replied, "Nah. It's all usual." She looked a bit stunned at my response. I continued, "All this pandemic and war, it's usual to a point. And people come and go. It's not so bad. So, how are you?" Then we chatted. She gave me something to do research on. We chatted about coachable kids. Then about her daughter ready to graduate from college. Together we cheered the tracksters on as I watched and hit my stopwatch for a couple kids, one I've been helping outside of school with his running.   As we sto

One Point

  One Point When my youngest lamented that third place didn’t mean all that much to her. That she expected a better performance from herself to gain more points for her track team. I then thought back to this time in my life during a high school track meet. I remarked to her, “You have no clue. Third place means a ton in athletics. And in track and field, yes it’s only one point. But a team can win by one point. Yes, even in track and field, it can happen.” In the spring of 1977, we were about to have our last dual high school track meet. And just days before I sprained both ankles, my left ankle was the worst of the two. Our Athletic Trainer was my cross-country coach. He really didn’t think I should race my event, the two mile. I expressed, “ …but we are going against Old Tappan!” He knew what that meant. Old Tappan was our sister school, as well as the team we would always want to beat. Heavy duty rivals we were. He shook his head and taped both of my swollen, yellow ankles. I t