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Showing posts from December, 2021

The Loaf Will Set You Free

  The Loaf Will Set You Free... So Wednesday after making four Norwegian Cardamom Loaves. I wondered who the fourth loaf would go to. I knew just the three of us would knock off two loaves in two days easily. We are freshly baked bread monster eaters. The third loaf I knew would go to one of my youngest's friend's family. However, the fourth loaf, I knew I had to give it away within thirty hours because it was so fresh and mostly organic that it would not be good past seventy-two hours.   So yesterday as I finished up a cool down walk after my run. I looked down our street as I saw a neighbor about 100 meters away walking up towards my home. I called out, "Hey! You eat Bread?!" She responded back, "Huh?!" I replied, "Bread! Do you eat bread?!" She was near 20 meters from me, "Well yeah. Im a Carbaholic." I replied, "Wait there. I got a fresh loaf I just made yesterday afternoon. Stay there. I'll be right back. I unlocked ou

"And When I Die..."

I must be in a sing song period of my life... So, here goes. That song by Blood, Sweat, and Tears, "And When I Die", rang through my head this morning.  Oddly I thought,  'when was the last time I listened to that CD of theirs with that song on it?' About six weeks ago, I remembered.  I was shadow-boxing in a room where I'd just ripped up the carpeting from.  It covered the floor for over a decade. The carpet, for over the past seven years had wrestling mats over most of it. It was in the main area of the basement. Yes, before we allowed our oldest to commandeer that part of the basement over two years ago for privacy.  It had been a wrestling basement.  A few of my old teammates from the Asylum Fight Gym would come over and roll with me and each other.  We would coach each other on my basement floor. Usually Saturday mornings and sometimes I'd throw in a Wednesday night at nine o'clock, after work and after I tucked the kids in.  It's funny, we neve

A Little Woman

As I watch documentaries this week.  I watched a documentary on Bruce Lee, which included how the United States... the bigotry of white people was rampant on all people of color. I'm old enough to remember when Asians, African-Americans, Hispanics, Indigenous and many other people of color were rarely, if ever given large acting parts in Hollywood. I'm also observant enough to recognize misogyny. Misogyny,  hatred towards the female gender. I saw it, and was subjected to it growing up. It effected and effects education, business, and sports in female lives. Especially,  if you were a girl/woman in sports, politics and business during my childhood and many, many millennium before. Men undermining girls and women who superseded their intelligence as well their self-proclaimed toughness. A significant example would be J. Edgar Hoover taking credit for the codebreaking Elizabeth Smith-Friedman actually did for the United States government covering two World Wars. As Ms. Smith-F


  Anticipation…2022 I’m going to date myself here. Not like I don’t on a regular basis.   However, anyone remembering the song by Carly Simon, “Anticipation”?   Well… a few of you will.   The rest will perhaps Google out of curiosity. So, it goes. Over this week and into January 1 st , we all may be exposed to the media displaying what has transpired over the year of 2021, soon to be history. Some outlets will focus on the passing of celebrities and politicians. And or political events. Perhaps catastrophic events by none other than Mother Nature… Induced by some Man-not-so-kind actions and events, perhaps. Yet, what will each individual take away from it all? Are our experiences null and void, because of lack of fame? Or perhaps, we’d like to escape from even acknowledging 2021 existed. Or will we think of 2021 as a strange sort of historical year? Only individuals themselves will know how they internalize the year of 2021. So, about eight billion souls will have eight billion d

A Depression of Sorts

  Here we are... remaining in a perpetual tongue-in-cheek "Groundhog Day" performance. Pray tell, where is Bill Murray when you need him? He is perhaps smartly at an undisclosed location, social distancing and or perhaps vaccinated and or masked.  Much will do. Yes the world, I will now declare is going through the war of survival against a microscopic,  yet potentially deadly enemy.  And for those of you who are not a hermit, my condolences. In the 1960s and into the 1970s, much of what I heard as a child, was about the Great Depression. It was about the rationing, my dad would reminisce about. He felt we were spoiled because we didn't have to ration. Yet, he was the big spender on beer, cigarettes and better food than his children. Oh yes.  What he brought, is what we are experiencing today. As we have since the beginning of 2020. And what we would be experiencing during a Depression and or war time period. It is the uncertainty of what each day could bring. Yet, ther

The Compassion of Nature

  The caring and love we can learn from watching nature. As I have taken time to observe nature throughout my life. Recently,  I've witnessed something I'd not ever thought would be possible in the wild. Although I've witnessed this caring and compassion among my domestic animals. Over the past two months our deer herd has grown to about fourteen or so. The herd lives primarily in my 'neck of the woods'. Yet, they travel upto and at least eight miles round trip per day through local towns around me.  I know this to be so.  The way I now know this, is of their markings, their individual gaits and their personalities which I've become familiar with. I've watched the herd shrink and grow over the last bunch of years.  Yet, because of the pandemic,  loss of life,  loss of a regular work schedule and reduced fight training, running mostly locally. I've been remaining mostly local for over two years now. What I've witnessed in the past two months were

Heartache and Hope's not what you think.  At least not for me.  This is about feeling, understanding,  compassion.  All the things I have felt humans lack quite often for one another.  The lack of it, I have witnessed it throughout my life.  That is what has thrusted me into the format of screenplays I write.  Quite often it is about awareness.  Bringing  awareness of our lack of caring. Our lack of courage.  Our selfishness of demanding ourselves to remain in our self-contained worlds. We willingly stay within our bubble. It is comfortable. Comfort is what we want.  We don't want to step outside of our comfort zone. And pray tell, we certainly fear for our children to do so too. Earlier tonight I had this discussion with a friend.  There were two heavy topics we discussed. One was of a medical nature.  The other was of having the experience of knowing, understanding and accepting those who seem unaccepted,  misunderstood by our society. Okay follow me. At this point my dad w

Lost and Found

  Lost and Found One thing I have always wanted to know was… Have I made a useful impression on my two children that could help them in their lives after I’m gone? It’s truly the main thrust of my existence in their lives. Because what use would I have been, if there was nothing of some form of knowledge of power that I had not passed on to them? No other reliable source more powerful than I to depend on, outside of their own fortitude? For over a decade of their young lives four to five mornings a week before usually before school. We touched upon religious readings/lessons at home, anatomy & physiology and as we were ready to drive off the United States Constitution. And most of the twenty-seven amendments. And finally, I wanted to know what they were grateful for, for that day. They were not allowed to hear any music, nor leave the car for school till they told me one thing for that day that they were grateful for. This stopped mostly before their ages fifteen and seventeen ye


  Whaaat?! Oh yes. Calling from another room . That’s what many of us do, within our family relationships. My mother despised the ‘ Calling from another room’ …   As well, my husband said he didn’t like it so much. But somehow, he did not remark his disdain for it till our children were nearly teenagers, and us nearing the thirty-year mark of our marriage. One day about six years ago, I sat and wondered, ‘When exactly did my husband start despising the Calling from another room trick? Was it after my Mom had passed? I thought more. No . My brain replied. So, it was after the turn of the century for sure. Hmmmmmm. When was it? And what was it that made it so unpalatable to him?’   I pondered. I can say I don’t really like it either. However, the excuse for the use of the Calling from another room trick. Yes, I have one. My non-condemnation of the use of Calling from another room trick, is that… Well… with the teenagers I’m trying to give them their space. Especially, if we’ve h

Without Change...

  Without change... we become stale. I know this.  As much as we humans do not usually crave change. Without it, we lack growth.  With it, there are increased stresssors. However,  without stress there is very little chance for improvement.  Evolution is needed. But without change there is no forward progression. Thus, no evolution. No true chance for betterment of humanity. Yes, many people do not maintain consistency in their exercise.   Most decide to do a bucket list of sorts. Then they fall off a pattern of pushing to improve.  Why? Because,  true effort to feel a process towards one's potential seems painful. And at times may very well be very painful. Recently, a scientist made a discovery about pain and respiration.  Yes, recently. As I listened to the interview tonight, I realized I'd figure  out early in life what he just announced. But the reason why this now became so significant, is that news was to be exposed to the masses.  Not for the people like me who know