The Chicken Sucked

 

The chicken sucked, a baby was crying, a granddad was being loud with his grandsons at a table nearby in the diner; however, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gone out to eat with someone. Especially with a family member. Now, upon further reflection it was June 14^th, 2025, on the Santa Monica Blvd with our daughters and our eldest’s friend after her college graduation. And the food was beef and it was grand—$600 later and still perhaps the best food I’d ever had out.

Back to the other night, I was having a meal with our youngest at an eatery of her selection. She was overly distracted, but I understood all the distractions they were fun, anxious and seemingly at top speed. Up until recently I’d been at top speed. Our oldest now has recognized that top speed isn’t always necessary; however, I warned her of the very thing I demonstrated back home to her throughout her childhood—intensity. I remarked, “Your dad was the exception in a spouse handling my intensity as a science person. Dad called me ‘The Good Little German’. Many of my friends have been men. I’ve been friends with these men who are intense and have been heavily into the sciences of their fields. Some who are no longer alive, they didn’t get married, didn’t father a child. One was married and divorced in one year. And honey, this has to do with science.” Those are the kind of conversations I have when someone is holding at Mach One, but has come down from Mach 5, because they’ve learned something. Currently both our children are in STEM oriented work/studies and it’s intense.

As our youngest is hitting her MACH 5, as she was just hired for an intense internship. This coming up before her first real vacation in over four years of more than two days also coming up, and not to see colleges for she’s about to graduate from college by mid-2027. All this happening at once, along with her keeping in touch with her hometown friends. She’s gregarious, her friends and friend groups are of varied backgrounds which I love that for her. It’s not just artsy friends, it’s her gaming friends, her fishing friends, her music friends and the list goes on.

I sat there the other night in the diner across from our youngest awaiting food. Her eyes darted not connecting with mine and then to her phone she’d brought in with her. I said nothing because I’m not at MACH 5 anymore. This as the noise level to anyone like me who despises noise mostly while eating, yet I enjoy no noise at all most of the time. I’ve been going back as if time warped to the 1960s and 1970s, it’s partially the political atmosphere that’s helped bring this warp drive backwards to me. It’s like I’m that kid playing a pickup game of tackle football as an eight-year-old girl with my brother and his friends in construction sites, or a designated field in town, where I’d just taken my orders from him and tackled people. At the same token, I truly enjoyed creating car tracks and highways with the plastic Matchbox tracks my brother had little use for, due to his being quite social and popular, conversely to my lack thereof. I enjoyed pretending alone in my room for hours on end, which indeed bothered my mother. Yet I was quite content to be alone and in my own imagination, and the good guys always won.

So, I tolerated the noises in the diner that night to reconnect with our youngest, as she’d been away at college. When the food arrived, I got a look to my eyes from her. Good. Food brought her to my MACH One level, as I shut out all the background noises. I’ve become an expert at compartmentalization, desensitization and disassociation, I learned that as a child. She’d noted earlier in the day, when I’d finally bantered back that she wasn’t letting me complete a thought with her MACH 5 shut down clause; however, typical of a science-minded 21-year-old, I had let it slide till then. She rolled her eyes and said, “So, you never say that. I never realize that you’ve thought that way.” I countered, “Well, you’re making your decisions. And I figure that you’ll realize at some point and time that the area concerning you will be revisited again, ‘cause that’s what happens.” A sigh came from her that maybe, perhaps mom isn’t as dumb as I thought she was. My sometimes hands off approach at times can keep the peace. I don’t always think they need my opinion. As a matter of fact, unless I think they’re dead wrong and it could be socially catastrophic for them, I stay quiet.

As we were somewhat reconnecting at the diner, I lied and said the roast chicken was good. No.  The Chicken was dry. It was a half-roast chicken and the chicken sucked. That helped me move gears to how truly great the service was and onto my having watched a regional college softball game between Texas A&M and Arizona State, before she’d arrived home from lifting weights with a friend.

So, at the diner, I declared to her that although Arizona State’s team seemed exceptional and was favored to win; that in order for Texas A&M to have a chance to win they needed to change two things. At this point concerning sports, our youngest has only known me as someone who knows a ton about long-distance running (50 years), a good amount of professional football (NFL watching pros since 1966), wrestling, boxing and a portion of MMA (regular training  since 2009-2019). I was professional in three sports while working full-time, being married, parenting and keeping house with hubby and not getting much sleep. I think that’s my MACH 5.

I flat out said the one pitcher from Texas A&M needed to lose 45-50 pounds and was terribly out of shape. Her having not played softball, didn’t know I had years of experience in doing so. She’d apparently disregarded my business/studies in the area of physiology since 1992 and did her MACH 5 slam clause on me of how I was being judgmental. I slowly tried to deliver the logic in the science of how baseball decades ago went through this evolution, till about the time of Nolan Ryan who’d pitched for four MLB teams. The last one being the Texas Rangers seemed always lean and in shape, that’s when I’d watched baseball. After that, I’m no longer a fan of MLB. The guys who were pitchers who weren’t in shape many had more shoulder and elbow injuries and times on the IL (Injured List) than the guys like Ryan who’d been able to recover quicker and last as a pitcher longer, as well more years in the MLB. The sport had changed and most MLB players now that are in good shape overall. Now, you don’t often see a MLB pitcher with a big gut. I knew she wouldn’t know this, so I let her shut me down immediately. Funny, back in the 1960’s and 1970’s when I was a kid I wasn’t allowed to speak at the dinner table, for one I was a girl, and second, I was not considered an adult—ever. It was as if I had nothing to offer. However, I see our children in a converse manner, they have something to offer, and you need to allow them to, even if they’re incorrect or they need a little polishing on their delivery to their parent or sibling.

Here I sat just being with our youngest, because I’m watching her learn. I’m a witness to her development. I know that her and her sister will have to contend with the goings on in the world long after I’ve passed, I won’t get in their way. I’ll listen and rebut privately. So, yeah, the chicken sucked; however, when we arrived home and settled for a few minutes I said, “I just wanted to let you know. I had played softball on three different teams since age nine. Including a women’s softball team from ages 12 to 18. I was mostly a pitcher, I played short-stop, third base and I knew how to plant the ball where I wanted it to land when at bat.” She looked at me, stunned. I added, “And so, I know a little bit about softball and also because I treated injured athletes in my business quite often over nearly 30 years, I kinda know when you’re in shape,not carrying extra weight that your mind and body have better endurance and there are less likely to be injuries to a pitcher who is cardiovascularly sound and has built overall endurance into their repertoire of being an athlete. I’m sorry I never told you that I’d played that much softball. And by the way, the chicken was too dry, but I enjoyed the meal with you.” She got it. The chicken sucked. ---Jody-Lynn Reicher