All Those Things

As I cleaned my home today, I'd realized there were a couple areas that hadn't been dusted or reckoned with since the passing of my husband over three years ago.

I was too busy cleaning to contemplate books. Books we have are in abundance. What happens to all those things that you don't take with you, when you die?
That was a question I'd pondered for decades. Now, I look for ways I can downsize without traumatizing our daughters. Without removing something I might be forced to buy once again. 
I fear leaving a legacy of all those things. Things that can be cumbersome after the death of a parent.  I've only revealed to one person exactly when I'd start packing.  But I know just for compassion and ease, I'll start some packing sooner.
I've dreamed of living with much less. I've practiced recently living with less. That included eating less. Monitoring how I cook, when to cook. Why would it be necessary to cook everyday when it's merely just for me? Most days I boil my coffee and tea water. And cook one meal a day. The rest are cold, raw meals or juiced. 
My attempts to waste nothing are mostly productive although still at times trial and error. You see I'm saving food, water, resources for those younger who come after me. That includes using less kilowatts, fossil fuel. I'm still driving like it's 1974. Staying within speed limits, coasting gently to the stop lights. Making a energy efficient circle of errands as I drive, even including them after a hike on my way home from hiking. No matter how tired I may be.
Things I'll spend money on, are no longer coffee out. I've curbed my sweet tooth.  I've lowered my meat consumption to near zero. Even my poultry and fish consumption is quite low.
I'll spend money for classes that are new and needed to maintain for my state therapy license.  Things that will help my brain, and assist me in my writing business.  I'm not retired, no I'm not. Because if I'm going to exist,  I still need to be productive and at times be of service to society as a whole. I refuse to just take up space.
I've heard in my years here on earth, some who've concerned themselves in wondering if I know how to be calm and relax. I'll leave that for them because they must need it more than I do.---Jody-Lynn Reicher