As winter now creeps into our jurisdiction. We fold up our
tarps, some head south. I stay put. I don’t know if a human being is supposed
to reflect every single day of their lives. But I know I do. I reflect on what
is. Sometimes I’m driving, doing a chore, raking or out running miles. As well,
I reflect on what was and what may be. Or what I hope to be.
I get my ‘aha!’ moments alone most often. Especially
nowadays. I do wonder what life would be like if my spouse had not gotten
terminally ill and died. Or remained ill, somehow and survived. On the latter
part, he would’ve been frustrated and saddened. On the first part, he would’ve
been grateful. That I know.
I reflect upon the population. The level of ambiguity,
uncertainty, and apathy. All of which I personally do not understand
completely, even after surviving so much myself. It’s nearly sixty years I’ve existed
on this earth. And yet, I still cannot wrap my mind around any disinterest in
other’s welfare. Or jealousy for no other reason than a primitive one. Yes, we
still haven’t rid ourselves of hatred for no reason.
Hatred is a heavy burden. But somehow many of us find it
easier to carry hatred, than to eat right, go for a walk or a run. Or consider
other’s plight that we know nothing about. We seem to lose interest in anyone
or any living thing in our lives other than our own being. This is nothing new.
This behavior goes back to Biblical times. It’s how humans are made. However, I
don’t believe we were meant to stay in such a distorted homeostasis as that.
We need to learn how to break free from the homeostasis we
are so comfortable in the living of. I
told my husband before he became terminal, “I hate to tell you this. But when
some of the old blood passes, we can become more evolved. We need to evolve, every
generation. If we don’t then we are
lost.” This is how I see the human condition. It should never remain the
same. It should always be progressing to
a higher level of understanding.
I once told a brain surgeon, “We need a variety of different
types of internists. Reason being, is that why would we give a woman the same
exact antibiotic, as we would a man? Or why would we give a woman with a
different chemical makeup the same antibiotic as another woman with an
auto-immune issue?” I basically explained how we should view the makeup of
people based on their chemistry and their psyche as well.
I told him, “If we are smart enough and evolving enough in
medicine we will have at least five different types of internists. And varying
degrees of antibiotics for each body type. I see this one hundred fifty years
from now.” I do wish it were sooner.
I told a friend who is an anesthesiologist, “We can do most
surgeries without any anesthetics.” We debated on who couldn’t or when it
couldn’t be done. But I know most surgeries that are done nowadays it’s
possible. I do know this to be true. My
internist knows this too. Imagine how healthy you would be if less drugs were
put into you for surgery, but yet pain wasn’t what you felt it was. Can you
imagine? I can. I’ve done that. And I’m not the first human being to have
experienced it, either. ---Jody-Lynn Reicher