Skip to main content

A Mental Health Day...Even for the quite Motivated

A Mental Health Day...Even for the quite Motivated:

Years ago as I lay in bed with our then almost three year old at 8:35pm, I had my alarm set for 12:30am. I had to get in a fifty mile run in  the morning before taking our daughters to ballet and then to the playground to meet up with their playdates for my day off of work. I have to say, I didn't think they were aware of what I did in a day, let alone anything, except my watching their ballet, soccer, Karate and doing ceramics, beadery with them and reading to them.

I thought they were aware that both my husband and I worked, stayed in shape, doing our own home chores, landscaping and so forth. But I don't think they understood the crewing Norm did for the charity running I'd done. The perception they must've had of seeing my running on a treadmill for twenty-four hours, then meeting me in Cape May and then in some obscure town nearing northern New Jersey after days of running.  Adults I knew couldn't grasp it. How could they? When our youngest was eighteen months old, after my two days of running she latched onto me, never wanting to let me go even as I showered myself with baby wipes so we could go out to eat smelling "clean".  Before my "wiping down", my three and a half year old said, "Mommy, you smell." My friend Dr. Jim Manning and husband, Norm laughed. 
I wondered what effect that my high-energy, self-motivation, along with my husband's desire to push the envelope would have on them. Then a couple years later, Norm pushing me to drastically change athletic careers from the peaceful essence of ultra-running to becoming a grappler and MMA fighter.

Over two years ago it truly showed.  At the time my husband tried to slow the girls down, especially our oldest. And now I imagine my late husband scolding me at first for allowing our daughters to do so much. But he'd witness me waiting in the wings with making certain our daughters had good meals made, time and conversation shared at nearly every dinner time.  Freedoms allowed with respect to staying in touch, and my waiting up for our oldest, as she had become eighteen after his passing.

As well, I do hover, yet let the leash out because I know I should.  At the same token, I make them take charge of things that not all parents in my neck of the woods do. At first they're frustrated.  But then they realize,  I don't have to be at every meeting, function, nor eye appointment. Nor can I do their banking, or get their passports renewed They need to do that But I can educate them beforehand.

I can set up a Zoom meeting in the future with a financial advisor for setting up their own retirement fund. Yes, and I'll pay for that for them right now. In the end, they are a product of their environment.  As my late husband would state. That being so, I've taught them that you do NOT sell yourself into injury or illness for others. 

This year, both our daughters witnessed my saying on separate occasions,  "You need a mental health day." My oldest fought me on it, but then I ruled saying, "Sorry, but this is a dictatorship of your mind, body and life for a better future." She acquiesced. I've explained my imperfections in sport and life to her. That is what I can offer as her mother. --- Jody-Lynn Reicher


Popular posts from this blog

Completion of Humanness

Completion of Humanness As we arrive to the completion of the first year without Norman, I had decided long before he'd passed that I would continue to do things certain things he liked yet could no longer do. I decided I would not take a day off of fitness.  I would run at least for 500 days in a row. I began that in early 2020.  I'd not be concerned with the distance I'd run. It was the very thing I convinced Norman and the thing that mattered to him, from the very first discussion we had August 11th, 1981, was fitness. I loved that he was a College Boy. He loved that I was a Marine. We tickled each other's soul with such admirations. Later fitness continued as an old discussion from 1994 ...getting outside and to run no matter what. I would say to him, "Run 200 meters, then 400 meters. If it doesn't feel good, stop. Turn around and walk back home and know you did your best. That is all you can ask of yourself." I said this,  knowing he would get dow

In My World

As I finish putting away the week's groceries, I contemplate other's lives. Aside from my two daughters,  I consider what may be other's lives.  How they have conducted their lives over the past two years.  This is a thought not unusual for me to have. Yet, it occurs more often than not. Especially  now, as the population is probably feeling ever more irked. Regarding perhaps. their illusion of any lack of their freedom. But isn't that what life is about? The illusion of who we are. What we are about. Where we stand on the planet. Who we love. And who loves us. Our significance. Couldn't we imagine if this were all just an illusion? Sounds like a "Twighlight Zone" episode, perhaps. My aim here, are the thoughts of reckoning. I'll explain why I'm claiming such a thing. For about twenty-eight years of a career in dealing with injured athletes,  pain patients, chronically ill and the terminally ill. I found that there were many people who lied to

Christmas is Full of ...

  Christmas is full of wishes, hopes, dreams and perhaps joys. Things we desire and things we need. Everyday I awaken, I know I have more now than I had as a child—by far. We have two refrigerators, air-conditioning, nice heating system, colored television, three landlines to phones, relatively new cars that we paid in full upon purchase.   Yes, no debt outside the monthly, quarterly, semi-annual and annual bills to pay. I can drive to the food store. Our daughters have never or rarely ever; I can count on one hand that they had to get something for the house because I’d forgotten an item or couldn’t afford it on my weekly shopping list. We have three pets. Our daughters have and will have an incredible education—the choice of being studious is up to them.   We have a double oven. We have an attic and a basement. Our daughters work, not because they have to right now, but because they want to. We parents have had our own bedroom. We have two bathrooms. We have a washer and a dryer.