Skip to main content

Underlying...

When I appear at my lowest, I see it clearer. Human cruelty. Putting out a carved pumpkin the other day. I said ‘Hello’ to a couple passing by. Let me interrupt. Don’t get me wrong, everyone has their dilemmas. Their life’s disruptions and so on. But after I said hello, turning, smiling at the couple. The wife who is a decade my junior comes back with, “You better be careful the squirrels will eat that.” My finding joy, after the recent passing of my husband of over thirty-six years somehow made her comment in a cruel fashion. However, it was not the first time she’d ever said a cruel thing to me, in the past two decades that I’ve lived in our neighborhood. I’ll give you another example of underlying cruelty, jealousy. Or better put, hatred. A man, owning a nearby nursery was asked by our youngest daughter four years ago at the innocent age of twelve. “I just started growing lemon trees. What can I do with the soil to help it grow them?” He replied, “It won’t work. You can’t do that.” Yes, that was his answer. Another example which has occurred so many times to me, especially in the last twenty years. As a person would see me out running. Then when they saw me at a store or a function, they would note they saw me running. I would reply, “Oh. Yes, I thought I saw you drive by me.” Their reply, “You should be careful you might get raped.” Little did they know I had already been raped many years before. This thought reoccurs every day when I look at the nearly five foot tall lemon tree our daughter has grown from seed. Its’ beautiful. Yesterday, I went to that same nursery… Why? You may ask. Its’ because I have constantly been reminded to disregard the hatred. I go to see his wife, who is a pleasure. For she is his rock. She barely knows me, but I know her. I bring her peace, hope, and quiet joy. Again, in simple conversation, without her around. His co-worker/son was ringing me up. He seemed a sweet twenty to thirty-year old man. The nursery owner, again for now I don’t know how many times in the past decade or so, threw out a cruel comment to me. I turned thanked the young man and said to the father the cruel human owner of the nursery, “Cancel, Cancel. Cancel, Cancel, that negative thought. And by the way, Norman is dead.” This quite short list…because I could give bukoo examples I’ve run into of human cruelty. This shows the world who those people are. As I now teach our children alone, about cruelty. Not that they don’t already understand cruelty. Yet, it is my job as a parent and decent human being to teach others that underlying cruelty people may inject into your thought process. In their hopes, that something goes awry in your life, because they are so miserable. Little do they know what goes on in someone else’s life. I had an acquaintance, who actually may be a friend. I don’t take that lightly. She revealed that she thought she knew me. She realized she didn’t. When asked why I didn’t make an announcement about my husband’s illness. Or even call her up about it, as he was dying. I replied, “I’m actually a very private person. Its’ about privacy. It was he who was dying, not me. Its’ also about respect.” I have now made a decision, that is when you think you have it worse than I. Or that I am somehow better off than you. I will remind you, that my husband is dead. That his children will not have him to see them through high school graduations, future educations, perhaps weddings, family gatherings. I drill it through you to make you feel the depth of your own cruelty. Why? Because I can. And you deserve what you give, back at you.--- Jody-Lynn Reicher

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Reicher's Official Holiday Letter

  “When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.” ---Ralph Waldo Emerson There are many ways to shed light on seemingly impossible situations or what we would consider obstacles to our daily living. It is not always in our daily intake and output that is the measurement of a human being. It is the grind. Some people struggle with miniscule grinds; while others have bus loads to grind through. Some don’t make it. Few do. Making it, is not, not dying. It’s progressing through even when there appears no light at the end of the tunnel. That there may not even be a twinkle of a star in the nights ahead. And the human that faces that, knowing full well that they can’t change the ending to their earthly story. Yet, they consciously go through the process, has made it. They’ve lived. No matter their age, I believe that, to be one of Life’s truths. As this year has progressed, the pandemic actually blessed us. Yep. Many would not agree with that. But then, they weren’t us. They weren’t our

This Day Marks...

  When it’s a tough road to hoe… Today. Tonight , in fact marks the evening of the end of a portion of our family as we knew it. I had a wicked day of work that day/evening. I had just finished rolling fairly hard in jujitsu class. Leftovers were to be warmed for the night’s meals. This day last year landed on a Friday before the beginning of a new year, a leap year at that. I stood in the ladies’ bathroom/dressing room after my Jujitsu class at Silver Fox BJJ in Butler.   Jess was at the front desk at the time. Enrique was in. Sean was in and he and I had discussed about when he was going into Marine Corps bootcamp. I realized I’d rolled some extra time with the second evening class and couldn’t wait to get home. I held my five-year old phone in my hand trying to see if my husband had messaged me. As I was about to message him, the phone went flying out of my hand landing facedown on the hard tile of the floor. It shattered the screen of the phone.   And for the first time in my

To Laconia and Canada Too

 He began, "So, I got this deal..."  Me, "Yeah?" Norman,  "I went up on 23, and saw her. " Me, "Where did you go?" Norman, "Sport Spot on 23 South.  And there she was." Me, "Uh oh."😊 Norman,  "I'm graduating to a BMW.  She was sitting there. 1986, an R80RT. A touring sportster... " Me, "What about the Yamaha, Norm?" Norman, "I'll get a buyer before I have to pick up the R80RT." It was 1987, we'd just had a semi long motorcycle ride up North together for a week. New England that'd be.  Norman was all enthralled about the open road. Married just over three years at the time, and he rediscovered a new love.  Me wary, yet curious.  'Maybe she'll ride easier.  Less bumpy on certain roadways of upstate New York'. Norman even had me considering getting a motorcycle license.  I'd driven nearly every style, engine from small military jeep to tractor trailers...