It’s funny. I am not a fan of Mother’s Day. It doesn’t mean that much to me. Actually, few days of celebration of any sort do. To me, they are days I celebrate mostly for others. Which most of the time brings me joy to do so. I’d rather do a drive-by, dropping something off without anyone seeing me. Normally, I’ve sent out cards. When I do, there is an emotional attachment. I spend the most on Mother’s Day cards, perhaps in the year.
When I had an office, I would have flowers and or candies out for clients. As well, anyone entering my office the week of. Even the mailman. Because you just never know. Perhaps even the mailman, needs a little cheer that week. Nowadays, over the past few years in doing only house calls. I bring flowers or some gift to clients for certain days of celebration. It is to lighten their day. A distraction perhaps from their maladies. My intention however, is to show them that I care deeply.
This brings me to my not being a fan of Mother’s Day for myself. I have found others to be so self-involved, in not considering anyone but themselves. Most of the time anyway. Now, this is not something new. It’s been this way since people walked the face of the earth. So, on this day as some others, I like to be left alone. To be cooking, cleaning, caring, writing, training alone, praying alone. I know how to rub elbows. I know how to charm people. However, I only do those things when warranted. I’d prefer staying within my soul. Letting my intuition guide me for that day, as if it were any other day of my life. That is when I am at my most joyous point.
The joyous point? That is, doing what I always do. Work is play. Play is work. I do not know the difference between work and play. Paid and charity. It all melds together. It becomes a balance. I have been on a mission of Tikun Olam. For decades I never had a phrase for it, till I met a woman who is Jewish. She gave me the phrase one day a couple years ago. Upon telling her, “I wish I didn’t have to get paid. That I could just give for free.” She then gave me the phrase. And said, “You are healing the world with the behavior.” Frankly, I never saw it that way and remarked such to her. She replied, “Everyone has that calling to heal the world. But we forget, that is in our souls. It’s innate.”
So, the thing that brings joy is not being a mother. Although I am. Yet, it is in having the depth of caring for all. Concerning all. Always knowing that I check myself on this. I ask myself quite often throughout every day, “Did I consider a stranger, or strangers?” We can all be distracted by our own pains and our family pains. Or perhaps a friends’. However, can we pull ourselves out of the self-serving idolatry that makes us believe we need to be constantly catered to? That we need a special day, every year.
We individually can make our days, special. Any day at any time. At least most of us can. Just like it is not up to someone else to make You happy. You make You happy. And once You do… You then acknowledge it and bring your own joy to the table of humanity.---Jody-Lynn Reicher