.....Later, it was to endure healing, working, attempting to stay fit, and getting ready for trial, that I would soon testify in. The exhaustion of physical pain, let alone not knowing exactly the outcome of the trial, nor my health, nor much of my future was all encompassing and exhausting, as I fought off flashbacks, sleepless nights at times too.
The aftermath; as the dust settled from the medical treatments which would carry on past a decade beyond the trial and conviction of my attacker, was beyond exhausting. As well as trying to build another career so I could work and not be in so much pain. All encompassing, all exhausting. More disruptions which would keep me in a near constant state of exhaustion, I decided were normal. To get myself into a very physically fit arena, I decided to run as far as I could. Even after I became a mother, exhaustion was my mainstay and I would fight it to survive another angered, anxious day, in hope that the exhaustion, the feeling of giving all I could would bring about peace. A peace I did attain, yet was cautious about. Like the “Grateful Dead” song goes, “When it looks like easy street, there is trouble up ahead…”